It's been nice in Montreal for the past few days. Which sucks, because I have finals and essays coming up, but I've been trying to reconcile this by doing my readings outside, in the open air. I figured out today that as long as my ass is on grass and my head is in the clouds with a book in my hand, I'm doing alright, and I have the potential for happiness right there. I don't mean head in the clouds like I'm being a dreamer, I mean a clear, un-broken line between my head and the sky.
But on Friday I couldn't stop myself from going for a walk. It started as a quest to find a bike I had seen the night before that was out of the way and didn't have a lock on it and I figured that if it was still there 24 hours later then it's pretty much up for grabs, I figured that's how the city works. However, on the way, I was struck by an insurmountable desire for poutine. See, the night before, I think, this guy wouldn't stop talking about the poutine at this place, the Montreal Pool Room. He said it was the best poutine he had ever tasted, and it was completely vegetarian, too, and he made it sound ridiculously good. He desperately wanted to go, so he sold it, and he's a drama student, so he sold it well. And it made me hungry, and gave me a desire for this poutine, when I hadn't had poutine for, like, 2 years before that, because veggie poutine always looked kind of gross. But if this stuff was as good as he said, then I'd make an exception, and jump right in. So I turned up St. Laurent, searching low and high for this place (which I just discovered, a second ago, is on the other side of St. Laurent as where I was looking), and I guess none of this is really important, but I walked for a long time. I walked up to Little Italy then back down du Parc, then climbed the mountain and got some garlic potatoes on the other side. It was an adventure. I decided early on that I was going to do it sans music, so I could hear everything that happened. I found amazing stores and places and curiousities such as these. I stumbled upon the chalet on Mont Real, it was ridiculous, I just found it, I wasn't even looking for it, didn't even know what it was at first, I stepped into it, and there was barely anyone inside and it was ridiculous, I want to dance in there sometime.
This is just to put you into my sort of mindset, I was amazed by this city, by what it is and what it could be, and there were so many people out, just doing their thing. The thing is, though, yesterday and today, I've been spending more times in parks and cafes, trying to get my study-on. And I have seen people, pathetic people, sorry people, sad people. I have one of their guitars, because this guy could not trust anyone else with it, even though he had just met me, and he was scared it was going to be taken from him in the night, and he needed it, so he entrusted me with it, with this thing that's keeping him off drugs and everything (so he said) and I'm supposed to meet up with him in a few days where we met and give it back to him.
I cannot imagine being in that situation, I cannot imagine living on the streets, I cannot imagine living day-to-day, and only trusting the people you meet today. I mean, I used to romanticize it, look at the travelers, mostly, with all their stuff on their back, living fleeting existences as they go from place to place, meeting people where they can, sleeping in shitty hostels and everything, but there are so many people who live like that and are miserable for it.
I mean, I'm still trying to be happy, but I've seen a lot of things recently that'll stay with me, but I think I'm a better person for it. I've kind of realized that anyone can be happy when they're blind, you know, the whole, "living is easy with eyes closed", but it takes someone special to be happy when they've seen what the world is, what it can be, what it can do to people, and not accept it, and try and change it, but still be happy, and not let it get to them. And, I don't know, I kind of want to be someone special.
But on Friday I couldn't stop myself from going for a walk. It started as a quest to find a bike I had seen the night before that was out of the way and didn't have a lock on it and I figured that if it was still there 24 hours later then it's pretty much up for grabs, I figured that's how the city works. However, on the way, I was struck by an insurmountable desire for poutine. See, the night before, I think, this guy wouldn't stop talking about the poutine at this place, the Montreal Pool Room. He said it was the best poutine he had ever tasted, and it was completely vegetarian, too, and he made it sound ridiculously good. He desperately wanted to go, so he sold it, and he's a drama student, so he sold it well. And it made me hungry, and gave me a desire for this poutine, when I hadn't had poutine for, like, 2 years before that, because veggie poutine always looked kind of gross. But if this stuff was as good as he said, then I'd make an exception, and jump right in. So I turned up St. Laurent, searching low and high for this place (which I just discovered, a second ago, is on the other side of St. Laurent as where I was looking), and I guess none of this is really important, but I walked for a long time. I walked up to Little Italy then back down du Parc, then climbed the mountain and got some garlic potatoes on the other side. It was an adventure. I decided early on that I was going to do it sans music, so I could hear everything that happened. I found amazing stores and places and curiousities such as these. I stumbled upon the chalet on Mont Real, it was ridiculous, I just found it, I wasn't even looking for it, didn't even know what it was at first, I stepped into it, and there was barely anyone inside and it was ridiculous, I want to dance in there sometime.
This is just to put you into my sort of mindset, I was amazed by this city, by what it is and what it could be, and there were so many people out, just doing their thing. The thing is, though, yesterday and today, I've been spending more times in parks and cafes, trying to get my study-on. And I have seen people, pathetic people, sorry people, sad people. I have one of their guitars, because this guy could not trust anyone else with it, even though he had just met me, and he was scared it was going to be taken from him in the night, and he needed it, so he entrusted me with it, with this thing that's keeping him off drugs and everything (so he said) and I'm supposed to meet up with him in a few days where we met and give it back to him.
I cannot imagine being in that situation, I cannot imagine living on the streets, I cannot imagine living day-to-day, and only trusting the people you meet today. I mean, I used to romanticize it, look at the travelers, mostly, with all their stuff on their back, living fleeting existences as they go from place to place, meeting people where they can, sleeping in shitty hostels and everything, but there are so many people who live like that and are miserable for it.
I mean, I'm still trying to be happy, but I've seen a lot of things recently that'll stay with me, but I think I'm a better person for it. I've kind of realized that anyone can be happy when they're blind, you know, the whole, "living is easy with eyes closed", but it takes someone special to be happy when they've seen what the world is, what it can be, what it can do to people, and not accept it, and try and change it, but still be happy, and not let it get to them. And, I don't know, I kind of want to be someone special.
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